


Two Mechs and a Cornstalk

by sassycatpants



Category: Transformers - All Media Types
Genre: Gen, Harvest Moon AU, Multi, Slice of Life, basically a farming au but with robots, shenanigans and crack
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-04-07
Updated: 2018-10-04
Packaged: 2019-04-19 14:05:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 957
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14238897
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sassycatpants/pseuds/sassycatpants
Summary: In which Grimlock has three years to restore his grandfather's farm to its former glory, Starscream wants to turn it into a theme park dedicated to himself, Sparkplug wants to kiss Grimlock and Thundercracker just wants someone to pay for the goddamn chicken.(Life in sleepy little Iacon Village had never been quite so exciting before the dinobot moved in.)





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Me and a friend have a silly Harvest Moon we're RPing together that's basically just robots in a human sized farming village and it's kind of _really funny_ and we need more funny in life so I'm sharing it with y'all in the form of slice of life ficlets set in that universe.
> 
> Enjoy.

1.

The letter arrives in his mailbox one soggy winter afternoon; his grandfather is dead, and has left his farm to Grimlock. He isn't even aware he even _had_ a grandfather, nor that he owned a farm, but apparently he had and did. And now it belongs to him.

So Grimlock puts his affairs in order and leaves Kaon City for the sleepy little Iacon Village.

2.

Grimlock arrives at Iacon Village on the first day of Spring, smack in the middle of the new year’s festival.

While the village itself is actually rather nice, the farm he’s inherited is in less than desirable condition; it seems that his mysterious grandfather had not actually been much of a farmer, instead squandering his fortune in the local bar and letting the farm that he himself had inherited fall apart around him.

And then he’d gone and died, leaving his barely functioning farm to Grimlock.

But hard work is nothing new, and the dinobot rolls up his proverbial sleeves, kicks the annoying seeker claiming to be the mayor off his new farm, and sets to work clearing the fields.

(“We – meaning the village, of course – have decided that if you don’t turn this wreck around in the next three years, then I’m repossessing the property! So you better get to work!” Starscream informs him, somewhere between introducing himself as the mayor and being kicked off the farm. Grimlock normally wouldn’t care, happy to turn the property over for the village to do as they pleased but the seeker had been more annoying than Swoop after a night of heavy drinking, and he finds himself feeling rather spiteful.)

And that’s how Grimlock’s first day as a farmer goes.

3.

Naturally, everyone wants to meet their newest neighbor. Day two of his new life on the farm finds Grimlock with a revolving door of visitors coming to say hello and give him things. From Ironhide, who owns the ranch and pasture just beyond his own fields, offering him a coupon for a free milker with his first cow to Misfire who introduces himself as one of the Scavengers, a group of misfit friends who apparently own the local junk shop, before handing him a piece of scrap metal and taking off again.

And then there’s the tiny seeker Sparkplug, who barely reaches his waist. She’s holding a chicken the first time he sees her in the village, trying to put it on the head of one of the many Starscream statues in the town square. She whips around the moment their EM fields brush, optics spiraling wide before narrowing again.

“Oh. You’re the new farmer, right? Hey, wanna help me get this chicken onto Starscream’s head? It drives him mad when he finds them on the statues.”

“Yeah, sure.” Large hands pluck the tiny bird from talons gently, and place the bird carefully atop the golden figure. The chicken squawks at the indignity before settling in for a nap. Sparkplug grins up at him and Grimlock feels his spark flutter as she starts laughing.

“He’s going to murder me, but it’s absolutely worth it. I’m Sparkplug, but you can call me Sparky!”

“Grimlock.”

“Nice to meet you. Wanna help me with some more pranks?”

“Absolutely.”

(It’s love at first sight for Grimlock. Later, she’ll admit that she maybe kind of fell in love with him the minute he lifted her up through a window so she could graffiti Starscream’s office, but right now that conversation is far in the future. Right now, it’s Sparkplug and Grimlock and a list of pranks as long as his arm.

It’s kind of perfect, really.)


	2. Chapter 2

There's a goat in his fields.

That was probably normal in a farming village, but it's not  _his_ goat, and that's what makes it abnormal. Grimlock has never seen this goat before in his life. But since it's not hurting anyone (and is, in fact helping by eating the grass that Grimlock had been planning to burn away  _anyway_ ), Grimlock leaves it in the field and tends to his little vegetable patch instead.

The turnips are coming along nicely.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes in Harvest Moon you just do one task for the day and then go to bed and that's what happened here.
> 
> Grimlock watered his turnips, pulled some weeds and went to bed.


	3. Chapter 3

The goat, it turns out a week later, belongs to a mech named Drift.

Apparently he's a local  _wandering vagabond_ , which Grimlock thinks is just a really fancy way of saying that he's a freeloader at the inn, doing odd jobs around town to pay for the upkeep of his goat. (Actually  _The Valvepit,_  but he learns early on to just call it "the inn" like everyone else. For obvious reasons, no one is willing talk about the inn.)

He's a hard mech to track down, but eventually Grimlock finds Drift waist deep in the local lake, stabbing fish with his sword.

"What the hell are you doing?"

"Fishing! The inn's serving fish tonight, so I offered to get it."

There's a pause as Grimlock digests this news, before nodding slowly. Right. He's not going to touch that. "Whatever--Your goat."

"Oh! Madelaine! What about her?"

"She's in my fields."

Drift pauses mid stab, turning his helm to blink optics at Grimlock blankly before he realizes what the dinobot is talking about and looks sheepish. "Sorry! I forgot--Farm's been empty so long and no one complained about letting her use the fields, I forgot that it was yours now."

Well, that explains a lot. And the goat  _is_ doing him a favor by eating grass and weeds. Grimlock considers for few moments as Drift resumes his fishing, watching his pile of fish grow.

"You can keep setting her in the field," he decides eventually. "As long as she doesn't eat crops or anything, then it's fine. Saves me on pulling weeds." Drift beamed.

And that's how Grimlock rented a goat.


End file.
